


Anxiety

by amlovabledeathmo



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Gandalf meant well, M/M, OOC Bilbo, anxietyfull Bilbo, not as much of a jerk Gandalf, ooc everyone probably, protective dwarfs
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-04
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-16 11:20:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29206503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amlovabledeathmo/pseuds/amlovabledeathmo
Summary: What is a curious (and highly anxious) hobbit to do when a wizard drags him into his nonsense.
Relationships: Bilbo Baggins/Thorin Oakenshield
Comments: 12
Kudos: 45





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'll be real honest here, as much as I love my idea the depression has been bad for a while so I do not promise updates or a conclusion. I want to obviously which is why I'm posting to maybe help with motivation. Please enjoy the idea anyway.

Bilbo was happily puffing on his pipe, purposely avoiding thinking about the party that was not two weeks away. He still hadn't figured out how to get out of it. Besides that issue, it was a lovely day, sunny but with a soft breeze and plenty of wispy white clouds floating about. No one had come to bother him yet so it was a peaceful day. The first hint of something wrong was a puff of smoke breaking across his face. The second was someone clearing their throat.

Poor Bilbo opened his eyes only to see a very large person looming over his fence. Now it may not have been polite but Bilbo squeaked and ran inside his smial, slamming and locking his door then proceeding to hide under a blanket in his closet. After a few hours Bilbo crept out of his closet trailing the blanket behind him and avoiding the windows. He had no reason to leave the house so after peering around his rooms cautiously he fixed himself a large luncheon and went back into hiding only this time in his study.

By supper Bilbo was feeling much calmer and had just about forgotten his earlier fright. He left his study intent on finding something tasty when a knock came. Assuming that it was his friend (and gardener) who often visited late to share the days gossip, Bilbo yanked open the door, the start of a tirade about big folk on his lips when he froze.

“Dwalin at your service.”

The sound that left Bilbo was best described as a sick duck trying to quack, which of course left the dwarf at the door less than impressed. He shoved past Bilbo removing his cloak and asking after supper. At this point if Bilbo was a brave hobbit, he might have responded negatively and attempted to kick the dwarf out, or if he was a proper hobbit he might have reminded the dwarf of manners before politely inviting him to sit, instead he scurried off to the dining room, gestured for Dwalin to sit then fled to his main pantry to bring supper.

Obviously this dwarf Dwa something had the wrong house or maybe thought this was an inn but Bilbo would have to talk to him to let him know. It would be easier to just gather supper and let the dwarf eat. Hopefully he would realize this was the wrong smial or just be on his way after supper. Once Bilbo had spent considerable time deliberating the amount of food needed he finally decided to just go with all of it. After all it's always better to have too much than to have too little. Plus at least that way there should be something the dwarf will like. The tea cart was loaded down with food so he wheeled carefully towards his guest. What was he expected to say? It seemed far to late to introduce himself now. Should he just put the food on the table and go get plates or leave the food on the cart until he got plates? Why didn't he get plates first?

He hadn't realized the noise until it stopped when he entered the dining room. He jerked his head up to meet the gaze of far more eyes than he expected. Lucky for him (though super rude) the many (so many) dwarrow cheered and grabbed food off the cart, eating as they carried it to the table where someone had already gotten out plates and found his drinks. Bilbo quite logically took the opportunity to retreat as soon as the last platter was removed. This called for more food, he might even have to get into his second pantry, just to be safe. So instead of worrying about....people, Bilbo focused on breathing, in and out, slowly as he made a second, third, and even fourth trip to bring two pantries worth of food. After all, hobbits were excellent hosts as his father used to say.

Bilbo hovered at the edge of the room. The dwarves paid no mind to him, instead eating and joking and even throwing food. That last bit would have been much worse but the large dwarf had caught and eaten everything thrown. He was just gathering his small reserves of courage to ask the small one that wore lots of knitted things what was going on when his bell rang. He breathed a sigh of relief, it must be a hobbit since the first dwarf had knocked and presumably so did the rest else he would have heard the bell. Bilbo hurried to the door, hopefully it was whatever Took relative of his that had invited these dwarves come to collect them. He was most upset to find however that it was the big person who had startled him this very morning and yet another dwarf.

“Bilbo Baggins are you going to invite us in or just stand there and stare.” The tall one spoke.

“How? Who? What?” Bilbo stammered before just stepping back behind the door and letting the two enter.  
  
“This is the burglar?” The new dwarf snorted, “Seems like more of a grocer.”  
  
Bilbo knew from the tone of voice it was meant as an insult, he wasn't quite sure why since grocers were rather well respected in the Shire. In fact his uncle was a rather well known one and some could argue that him being a grocer was the best aspect of said uncles person.

“Thorin it'll do no good to insult our host.” A grey haired dwarf said. “He's been kind enough to have a real feast for us. We saved enough for you and the wizard.”

Bilbo gasped “Wizard?! Are you Gandalf the wizz popper maker?”  
  
He soon wished he hadn't spoken as all eyes turned to him. Bilbo shifted nervously rubbing the back of one leg with his other foot. It was a long few seconds in his mind before the new dwarf, Thorin, turned to Gandalf. “What is the meaning of this wizard? You said the burglar was an old friend of yours and that he'd been informed of our arrival but he didn't even know who you are.” All the other dwarves turned to face the wizard as well.  
  
“When I spoke of my old friend I did more mean his mother though I would say he is indeed an old friend even if it has been a fair number of years since I last saw him though, he was not more than a faunt then. I do believe that my arrival startled him this morning but I left the mark and Belladonna knows how to read it and would welcome a company of dwarves. Speaking of, where is she? I expected to be yelled at for marking her door instead of writing a note.” Gandalf looked around before settling on Bilbo. “Are your parents visiting the Great Smials now?”

“No Master Gandalf." Bilbo swallowed and looked at the floor, "It has been a fair number of years since my parents were with us.” Bilbo could feel his throat tighten, time had made the pain less sharp but it was not gone.

“How?” Gandalf asked quietly

“Wolves.” Bilbo looked up to see a few tears slide down the old wizard's face.

“I am saddened to hear this, Belladonna was a remarkable hobbit.” Gandalf whispered. The dwarves slipped away (or maybe stomped he really wasn't sure) until it was just Bilbo and Gandalf. “I had thought that she might accompany us. Belladonna always loved adventure and made travel much more fun. She followed me once when she was barely of age. Your grandfather was livid of course when we returned but she was pleased. She had even convinced me to take her to Rivendell instead of straight back home.” Gandalf sighed heavily before turning to follow the dwarves.  
  
Bilbo stayed put for a while, he remembered how his mother told him about the elves and that when he was a faunt he wanted to be just like her and tried to find elves in the woods. The older he grew the more he chose to stay put and ask about their home. Bungo had built Bag End for his mother and Bilbo had always loved architecture. He had thoroughly studied hobbit and mannish type but elven was harder to find. Maybe if he had decided to be a Took he would have had a chance to see it and study it for real and not just from half remembered descriptions. He sighed quietly and trailed after Gandalf.

The dining room was quite a bit quieter than it had been before Thorin and Gandalf. There was scattered whispering but the dwarves all seemed to be waiting for something. Thorin finished his plate then looked up. The first dwarf gestured impatiently “So will they come?”

Thorin took a deep breath, “No. The other lords said it is our quest and ours alone, they will not help until I have the Arkenstone in hand.” The burst of noise was enough to make Bilbo step behind the wall and brace himself. Anytime things got this loud in this manner, violence wasn't far behind. Surprisingly at a word, at least he thought it might have been a word, the gathered company quieted. “It matters not. We will continue our quest ourselves. I would take each and everyone of you over an army from the Iron Hills. Perhaps we can use our small number for stealth even if that is not the normal dwarvish way, but the dwarvish way was tested and failed the day the worm took our home! So we will try a new way and Mahal willing we will bring our people home.” Thorin finished his speech and the others cheered.

The knitted one spoke up “Uhm excuse me but isn't the front gate sealed with no other way in? Stealth is a good plan but breaking through a wall would take time and be very noisy.”

“Ori's right. The mountain is sealed.”

“Master Dori that is not entirely true.” Gandalf pulled a map and key out of his robes and handed them to Thorin. “This map speaks of another way in, a hidden door.”


	2. 2

Of course after the map was the discussion of how good a burglar Bilbo was. Now he might have said that he was indeed not a burglar, but Gandalf seemed most upset and Bilbo did not want to find out what an angry wizard would do. He supposed that his small food thefts as a faunt would count, after all he was successful far more often than his cousins, why he'd even managed to steal a whole pie from Aunt Mirabella. He might have bragged about that more but even the turn of years would not save him from her wrath if she found out it was him, she still yelled about the theft when she'd had a few too many cups of spiced wine at Yule.

Unfortunately his dear Aunty was the last thing he needed to worry about when the hatted dwarf went into excruciating detail about the foe that would be waiting for him if he joined this venture. Bilbo didn't really remember fainting but he was quite mortified to realize that he had, even more so when he came around while being settled in a chair by the last dwarf who'd arrived. Oh dear that meant that they'd all seen him. Gandalf sat with him and the fussy dwarf with intricate braids brought him a cup of tea.

“Oh my thank you. I should be getting the tea for you though oh dear. I’ve not been a very good host now have I, my father would be so ashamed.” Bilbo clutched his cup and stared at the portraits above the mantle. 

“That I doubt dear Bilbo. I’m fairly sure that Bungo would have fainted at the mention of a dragon while lovely Belladonna would probably be packed and yelling at us to hurry up even though it’s past sunset.” Gandalf too looked up at the portraits. 

“Letting a group of dwarrow into your home and feeding us all such delicious food and such large portions I think would show you a very good host. Why I haven’t been part of a party half so well hosted in many years.” Fussy told him and patted his shoulder before rejoining the others. 

Bilbo glanced at the contract that had been sat on the side table, “She would have jumped at the chance for another adventure wouldn’t she?”


	3. Chapter 3

The next morning was chaos, making sure the contract was all perfectly signed and tucked away, Bilbo had a letter he placed in the mailbox for his Grandfather and a key and note inside another envelope for his wonderful gardener. Belladonna's pack was stuffed full to bursting and the dwarves were checking for any misplaced items. It wasn’t all that long until they were on pony back and following the road out of the Shire. 

Bilbo let himself drop to the back and did his best to sniffle and sneeze quietly, how embarrassing to be allergic to the ponies. He certainly didn’t want them all to stare at him and make fun of him. Blasted handkerchiefs nowhere to be found, probably still sitting on his bedside stand waiting to be packed. 

“Uhm excuse me.” 

Bilbo jerked his head up having been completely caught up in his mind yelling at the forgotten handkerchiefs and sniffling into his sleeve. 

“I just realized that last night I never introduced myself. I’m Ori at your service.” Ori bowed towards him. 

“Ah oh yes of course introductions did seem to get passed over, Bilbo Baggins at yours?” His voice turned into a question, that seemed like the most logical response but maybe not, after all what did he really know about dwarves. 

“I was hoping you might be willing to talk to me. I don’t know much about hobbits, I’ve never even seen a book on them and it would be a great joy for me to make some notes and maybe possibly write the first book on hobbits. Well for dwarves, not to say there are no books on hobbits, I mean you probably have books on yourself, of course the elves,” 

Bilbo sneezed five times in quick succession interrupting Ori. He flushed red after he finished, “Ah my apologies, I’m afraid I’m allergic to the ponies. I’m sorry for interrupting you, please continue.” Bilbo dabbed at his nose with the edge of his sleeve.

Ori gaped at him for a few minutes, “Did you need some allergy ointment to rub on your face? Oin makes a really good one,” 

“Oh that would be lovely but I really don’t want to bother anyone.”

Ori waved away his protests and urged his pony to trot up to a dwarf who pulled out an ear trumpet. Bilbo mentally repeated Oin to himself trying to make the name and face stick. Pretty soon Oin handed a small pot to Ori who let his pony drop back again.

“Here you are.” Ori handed the small pot over, “Just rub a small amount all around your face especially near your nose and under your eyes. I have to use it when I spend any time with the ravens.”

Bilbo smiled gratefully and dutifully rubbed the ointment on, it wasn’t long before he felt better. “You said you wanted to talk about hobbits?” 

Ori squeaked and dug in his pack for a notebook and grey stone attached to the end of a stick.

“What’s that?” Bilbo pointed.

“Oh it’s my graphite stick, it’s so much better for use when travelling, no inks to spill. Do hobbits have their own language?”


	4. Chapter 4

Bilbo and Ori spent the time while riding together discussing hobbit and dwarf cultures and differences. Bilbo was pretty sure the adventure would be a lot worse if Ori hadn’t made an effort to befriend him. A few days in and Fussy was riding next to them. Bilbo learned his name was Dori and he was Ori’s older brother. He was quite knowledgeable on textiles and clothing styles well at least dwarven ones and they were soon discussing which fabrics were favored among their kinds and the most common styles as well as the fancy ones. Dori soon confessed to missing tea while on the road and admitted that he enjoyed making new brews. 

“I’ll help with that tonight when we camp.” Bilbo was happy to offer. His mother used to take him out to forage for different tea ingredients. That would be fun to see if he could find good ones. 

Once they made camp Bilbo searched around for any good tea ingredients. Ori was following him with his notebook open and every time Bilbo picked something Ori would sketch it and ask Bilbo all about it. Dori was thrilled when they got back to camp but had no idea what some of the ingredients tasted like and if they would pair well. Bilbo was happy to help with that too suggesting common Shire combinations before he realized that he could just make a tiny amount of tea of the different ingredients as they were for Dori to try. It was quite an enjoyable night for being on the road. Even Balin joined them and tasted the different ingredients. 

That soon became a routine, other dwarves joining them for the days ride and Bilbo searching for tea ingredients and fresh water near their campsites. He was slowly learning their names and relations and even what they were skilled in. It was much better than he had hoped. He was still afraid to start conversations after all what if they didn’t want to talk to him but he was happy to not be left alone much.


	5. Chapter 5

It all seemed to be going much better for Bilbo. At this point he knew everyone’s name and could possibly maybe call a few friends but that was only if they were okay with it but he wasn’t going to ask. Gandalf had gone cantered ahead a few days back to try and meet with a friend so he claimed and all the dwarves actually seemed to be more relaxed without the wizard riding with them. 

Why he would almost say that the journey was getting easier but of course that’s when trolls decided to barge into camp and snatch them all up and put them in sacks. Lucky for Bilbo they hadn’t tied his too tightly and he was able to wriggle out. But how to get everyone else safe? Well he had an idea, maybe not a great one but better than hiding while they got eaten. Nothing for it but to take a deep breath and speak way louder than he was comfortable with. 

“Excuse me. You really are going about this all wrong.” Bilbo wrung his hands together looking firmly over the shoulder of the closest troll. 

“What’s that?”

“Uh with the uh well uh with the cooking.” Bilbo cleared his throat, trying to think. “Uh I mean you know dwarves just don’t work unless you do it right.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about I’ve eaten plenty raw and they worked fine.”

“Well you must have gotten lucky, you see. Uh Dwarves are known to give you hairballs,” the trolls looked unimpressed and one reached for Bombur, “And uh Worms! Yes they are usually riddled with parasites!”

“What would you know about it?”

“Well that’s uh why I’m so small you see. I uh I had been big like…like you three but I didn’t properly cook my dwarves once and got uhm got so sick that I ended up tiny.” Bilbo gestured to himself, the trolls looked a bit alarmed at that. 

“How are you supposed to cook them then?” The one with the ladle asked. 

“Uh you need a big uh pot, full of water and uhm some herbs. Uh some lavender, rose, and peppermint. You put the uh the dwarves in up to their necks so the uh the worms can come out their mouths and slowly warm up the water and let them soak for a few hours, that way the parasites leave and uhm their hair,” Bilbo glanced at the dwarves who had been yelling about the worms and hairballs, very offended and his eyes landed on Dwalin,”falls out. You see I was uh in the process of cleaning that dwarf over there when the others captured me and you can see his hair had started falling out. So it really is necessary to be safe you know.” 

The trolls looked over at Dwalin and back at Bilbo before huddling up and quite loudly but probably not loudly for trolls argued over whether they should trust the little squirrel thing and if it was worth it to take a chance or not. Bilbo was quietly creeping over to the sacks to start untying them when Gandalf yelled something and broke a boulder, letting sunlight hit the trolls who turned to stone. 

The relief was so great that Bilbo could feel the braveness leaving and the belated terrified tremors setting in. Soon enough he was shaking so hard his legs gave up. Oin was soon by his side talking to him though his brain simply refused to comply and understand, he truly did not know how long it was before he came back to himself and could answer.


	6. Chapter 6

He was a bit shocked to find himself astride a pony in front of none other than the leader of their company and riding into Rivendell. Some time had passed and if he thought really hard he could picture flashes of things like a disheveled brown wizard and Dori hefting him up in front of Thorin and riding wildly while things chased them, maybe and perhaps being surrounded by elves on horseback so the things chasing couldn’t get close. It seemed fake but he really couldn’t be sure. 

Bilbo turned his head to peer at the construction of the bridge they were currently going over. His mother had never been able to remember or explain how the floating (as she described them) bridges worked. He really wanted to get closer and sketch all the angles to find out. 

“I take it you are back with us Master Baggins.” A deep voice rumbled against his back causing Bilbo to start.

“Oh! Oh my! I yes I suppose I am. So sorry about that. Quite unmannerly to lose my head like that.” Bilbo hunched into himself. It was rather embarrassing now that he was thinking about it. 

“You kept your head well enough to save ours and I find myself in need of offering thanks for the lives of my kin.” Thorin nearly whispered in his ear.

Bilbo choked on air, he didn’t know it was even possible before that moment but Thorin speaking to him like that apparently made it so. His spluttering brought the attention of the rest of the group and he was soon overwhelmed by voices asking if he was okay and how did he feel. He was glad they were over the bridge by that point because someone would have surely gone over the edge with the swarming they did. “I’m fine perfectly fine, feeling a bit hungry but that’s to be expected what with missing our dinner.” 

“Not to worry Bilbo. Elrond has offered us food and lodging.” Gandalf spoke from somewhere behind him.


End file.
